Remember the Time
by MaiHikari92
Summary: Fanfic inspired by Michael Jackson's RIP Remember the Time. Hakkai reflects on why Kanan did what she did and Gojyo is there to help him... in his own way.


_Inspired by Michael Jackson's Remember the Time. Totally reminds me of Hakkai. I just love him and I am not a fan of Hakkai/Kanan, but this just came to me__  
_

It wasn't until after Gonou had changed into Hakkai that the first rain began, after that horrible night.

As soon as that clap of thunder roared in the night, Hakkai could feel memories bubble up within his mind. As hard as he tried he could not keep them down. His emerald eyes, now darkened by the angst growing within up, moved up to the redhaired man sitting across the table eating.

He had to be sure that the thunder was not a figment of his imagination; another horrible memory coming back to haunt him in hallucination. "Did you hear that, Gojyo?"

Gojyo looked up and swallowed the portion of soup that was in his mouth. "Huh? Oh, yeah, thunder…" Gojyo looked at Hakkai as if he was crazy… and perhaps he was.

"I see…" Hakkai paused for a moment, as if reflecting on something, before eating his soup quicker than Gojyo had ever seen him eat. That caught the redhead's attention. Hakkai had always told him to eat slower for various reasons; it would upset his stomach… the food could not be savored. So something was up.

"Hakkai… is something wr--?"

"Please excuse me, Gojyo…" Hakkai abruptly stoop up and left, going in his room. "I'm not feeling well," was all he said before the door shut with an unintended slam.

Gojyo sat in the same position for a while, slightly leaned forward, ready to get up from the table. But, he stilled. It wasn't for another few minutes that he leaned back in a more comfortable position to ponder what the hell had just happened.

In his room, Hakkai stood, looking through the window at the now increasing rain. His hand pressed against the cool glass, then quickly retracted it. Why was he punishing himself like this?

Because he deserved it. Or felt he deserved it.

The image of Kanan pressing his own dagger against herself flashed in his mind and his eyes squeezed shut. Many, many times he had thought about what was going through her mind at that moment. He had told her they would go home together. Who knows what could have happened? They could have raised the child together. He was good with kids. He would have raised the baby as his and Kanan's. Maybe Kanan had seen what he had done and thought of him a monster. She could have killed herself, before he had a chance to do it. Was she afraid of him? Didn't she remember how much he had loved her? How he still loved her, despite the huge bloody hole she had torn in his heart, ruining him for other women.

Didn't she remember?

The time they met? When they moved it together? When they made love? When they found out they were brother and sister, but it didn't matter because of the love they shared?

Everything had been perfect between them. What had he done wrong?

Gojyo waited for about an hour, before deciding to take matters into his own hands.

"Hakkai, you okay?" Gojyo knocked on the door, but there was no answer. He turned the doorknob and opened the door to see Hakkai. Just standing there.

He took a step and Hakkai started, turning towards him, in a surprised manner.

"Hey, Hakkai… let's go out…" Gojyo said. "A few drinks, a few poker games, a few women?" His eyebrows wiggled provocatively.

"Gojyo, I--" Hakkai began.

"Look, I know you miss her," Gojyo said. It took about a half hour of thinking for him to recognize the weather and connect it to Hakkai's feelings. "But, she would want you to have fun."

"Would she?" Hakkai smiled, bitterly.

Gojyo paused, thinking. "Maybe, maybe not… but I do?" He slapped Hakkai on the shoulder in a friendly way. "Come on, I can't have a gloomy roommate. It's bad for my image." Gojyo looked at his nailed in a pre maddona way.

This made Hakkai laughed. Genuinely. Finally.

"Okay."

There was still that hole in Hakkai's heart. But, now, Gojyo planned to fill it with memories, good memories, that he and Hakkai would share. And Hakkai was alright with that.


End file.
